“I’m not a feminist”

Rumena Buzarovska

Here are just a few facts that paint a vivid picture of the gender equality situation:

In Macedonia, when we talk about who is managing the country, we have 6 female mayors versus 75 male mayors. The government has only 4 female ministers versus 21 male ministers. A photo recently published on social media shows representatives of several political parties electing a presidential candidate, with 49 men versus 3 women sitting at the table.
In Macedonia, women with higher education earn 45 denars less than men with higher education, per hour.
In Macedonia, although 59% of citizens that have Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees are women, 75% of employers are men. Furthermore, in companies with more than 10 employees, the employers are men, and only men.

In Macedonia, working women have significantly lower income than working men, and are paid less than MKD15,000 on average, opposed to working men who earn just over MKD20,000.

Women in Macedonia spend eighteen times more time on washing dishes, three times more time on child care, twelve times more on cleaning, nine times more time on cooking.
There is a lack of a full time gynecologist in 43 municipalities in Macedonia. (The above data is taken mainly from Reactor).

Women aged 15 to 44 worldwide are more likely to be killed or maimed because of male violence than because of war, cancer, malaria, and traffic accidents combined. (“Men’s Explain Things to Me” by Rebecca Salnit).
These are just a few facts. There are thousands of them. Despite everything, it seems that every year, every month, every week, and every day, we need to explain the obvious existence not only of gender inequality, but also of serious and worrying discrimination against women both in our society and throughout the world. The explanation and conviction for something so obvious is just as absurd as when I have to argue with idiots who believe that the Earth is flat, or anti-vaxxers.
Explaining why I am a feminist, in the 21st century, in the post #MeToo era, in the era of free and easily accessible information is equally absurd and exhausting.

Explaining that if it wasn’t for feminism, now I wouldn’t be able to wear pants, choose my partner, go to college, vote, own property, have a job, choose to have children or not, drive a car, go out on the street by myself, seek justice if I’m sexually harassed or attacked, and a ton of other things that weren’t common for my grandmother’s generation – is equally absurd and exhausting.

That’s why every year, as March 8 approaches, the day of which we were mistakenly taught that is a celebration of the mother – that this is the only way that patriarchy values women – I’m overcome with despair and sadness when some (successful, often wonderful) women show up to one of the feminist events with their persistent claim: I am not a feminist. I understand these women (to some extent). They don’t want to be seen as different. They want to be valued on the basis of their work. But there is something else – and it is that they unwittingly lean toward the way men talk (oh yes, not all men!), who foster an underestimating attitude toward feminism, partially based on ignorance and (in this era of information, quite disgraceful) lack of information, but mostly afraid of losing undeserved, inherited positions of power, control, and superiority, in which they dictate the trends of what is “cool” and acceptable. They don’t want to lose that inherited position, as if the world will not become a better place in the lack of constant oppression of half of the world population. However, at the end of the day these self-proclaimed non-feminists again want to be part of the mainstream. They want to be accepted by cheeky, witty boys who are always excused, boys who set the rules and pick the players.

But so it was until now. I’m fortunate to live in times when change is mind-boggling and can be felt. I’m happy that those cheeky, witty boys who were always excused are now chubby dinosaurs that can wail all they want that they refuse to come to feminist events and won’t support feminist initiatives because we didn’t include them (men should, they say as if they all attended the same class, be more included in your activities. Ha ha ha). I am happy that the next generations of girls will have forty times more freedom and opportunities than my grandmother’s generation.
Therefore, I’m wishing you a happy March 8^th, feminists.